A time like this

It’s been a while since I’ve last posted. So much has happened. The obvious elephant in the room in the global pandemic that has turned our lives upside down and inside out. I’m feeling so many things. Part of me is hopeful that the coming weeks will bring a revival and part of me feels like I won’t have anything left to revive in another week.

I wasn’t expecting this. I thought maybe a couple of weeks without seeing my friends, family, boyfriend, students – easy. It’d be like a vacation. One week turned into two and now were at five weeks.

I was so wrong.

I’m hurting. I’m sure you are too. I don’t sleep at night and I feel numb during the day. I keep telling myself it could be worse and to find the light at the end of the tunnel. I’ve plunged into home renovation projects, watched a few movies (which is rare for me), and cleaned so much. But this feeling reminds me so much of how it felt a few years ago.

Bitterly lonely.

I made pretty terrible decisions during that stage of my life. I abandoned some of my best friends and I isolated myself out of fear. Went through the motions just to survive. Alone is no place to be. I guess I’m afraid to go down that road and not have a life raft thrown my way this time.

There has to be a purpose for this. That dark time of my life eventually brought SO much joy. I learned so much about myself and my faith in Jesus rescued me.

I’m calling out to Him to eradicate those negative thoughts of worthlessness, loneliness, fear, anxiety, disappointment, avolition, and sadness. They have no place.

I’m blessed. You’re blessed. We’re blessed in the good times AND in the bad times. The book of James set me right. Chapter 1 says: “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” James 1:2-4.

I guess it’s time to count it all joy.

I’m praying this is OVER soon. I miss people. I’m also praying our faith increases and our love for others bursts.

What’s your prayer for this season?

xoxo, Stacie

It Gets Better

I’ve been sad before. I know, it’s probably a huge surprise. I’m normally super outgoing, happy, and quirky, but I have definitely struggled with feeling alone. Not lonely – alone. I know I refer to my college years a lot, but I seriously learned so much about myself during my time at university.  When I was away at school I dealt with hardcore depression, anxiety, and an undiagnosed eating issue. I hated school. I’ve briefly mentioned this before, but I never wanted to go to college – I had my sights set on a dance career.  I was super sick and in a Crohn’s disease  flare – exactly what I needed when I was trying to have a good college experience. I was in an unhealthy relationship. I was homesick. I never saw my friends. I was on a steroid medication along with a handful of other pills that made my face swell, gave me horrible acne, terrible mood swings, and caused me to gain around 30 pounds. I was terrified to meet new people because of how quickly and drastically my body changed. I secluded myself in my tiny apartment room where I would skip meals upon meals to try to keep the inevitable pounds off my body. I felt like my life had turned against me. I genuinely saw a black hole swallowing my future. God forgot me.

I have only told a few people this story – it’s tough and dark so if you have a tender heart beware.

I distinctly remember sitting in my room one night my freshman year after I had an awful day. I felt disgusting. I looked disgusting. I had hit rock bottom. I did not want to do it anymore. I wanted out. I felt completely alone. Why in the world would God let my life suck that bad? I had lived a perfect life. I had followed every guideline He made for me, yet all my friends who “messed up” were living footloose and fancy free. I told no one about how intensely sad I was. My doctors would ask me if I was depressed and I would laugh it off and say “of course not”. I was too proud to admit that I was broken. Oh, how I wish I would have told someone. I wish, I wish, I wish I would have swallowed my pride. That night I poured a bottle of pills on my desk and stared at those tiny circles for about an hour. I wanted so badly to take them all, for something terrible happen to me, and for the intense sadness I was feeling to end. Those pills had ruined my life and they were going to be my ticket out.

I thought of everything I would miss.

I thought of my parents. My selfless Mama and Daddy.
I thought of my Granny who everyday prayed for my complete healing and was my heart and soul.
I thought of my brother, sister-in-law, and my sweet nephew, James, who I would never see grow up and learn new things.
I thought of the family I would never have.
I thought of the experiences I would never have.
I thought of dance.

I thought of death.

Then, I thought of life.

I put those satan candies back in the bottle and put them away. I’m not going to tell you that I felt the presence of the Lord wash over me and bring me happiness, but I will say I know He was in my room with me that night. He didn’t forget about me. He slowly pushed me in directions that would ultimately bring me peace and happiness. They were tough directions, but I’m so happy with the paths I was sent down. I argued with myself because I didn’t fit in the same box as everyone else and saw my life as a failure. Guys, Jesus didn’t fit in the same box as everyone else and He is the savior of the world! Let that sink in. Don’t base your happiness on the world’s standards of happiness, because you won’t be happy. Fight for your life. It is beyond worth it!

Again, my heart is content and whole. I still feel sad sometimes, but who doesn’t? I’ve learned to cling to God’s promises and not to the world’s frailty and it has made the BIGGEST difference. If you’re fighting sadness, please, please, please tell someone! I promise it gets better!


5 Ways To Stay Motivated + Cozy Sweater


IMG_7897IMG_7895IMG_7889IMG_7883IMG_7882IMG_7880IMG_7873IMG_7871IMG_7872IMG_7869IMG_7867IMG_7866Motivation can be easy to have when you first begin a task, but it can also be easy to lose when you’re far into it. I remember being a kid and getting so excited for back to school season. My favorite item to purchase was a planner – if that doesn’t say something about my personality, then I don’t know what will. I don’t like making quick decisions and I certainly don’t love the unknown. Planners are great because it’s easy to set goals and visually see when you achieve them – it’s kind of like a mini celebration when you can cross something off your to-do list! However, if you’re like me and you set TONS of goals, you can quickly become overwhelmed and start losing motivation to achieve them. Here’s 5 ways to kick that lackadaisical spirit out of your system:

1. Set smaller, daily goals. Those huge goals stare your down and you can lose sight of the smaller things that need to be completed before you move on to the bigger things. Plus, more things to check off your list, I promise you’ll feel like a winner!

2. Only take on tasks that are working towards your goals. I’m such a “yes” girl. It’s actually one of my biggest faults. I always feel like saying “no” means I’m letting someone down, which is a huge fear of mine. I’ve learned to say “no” when I know something is going to cause unwanted distractions or stress. The key is saying “no” with grace. Don’t burn bridges when you decline opportunities.

3. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. For me, sleep is my reset button. I’ve had a bad day? Sleep. I don’t feel great? Sleep. I feel chunky? Sleep. I’m hungry? Sleep. I’m full? Sleep. 🙂 My Granny always told me the cure for anything was a hot shower and good sleep. I believe it. I gain perspective after I’ve rested and it’s easier for me to see the big picture. Plus, when you have energy, you have motivation!

4. Believe in yourself. I know that’s cliché, but the key is actually believing in your goals. There are a few things I’ve started losing passion about over the last few years. I started second guessing my intelligence, worth, and abilities.  Boy, do I have news for you – in the most humble way – I can do anything. It’s all a matter of believing in yourself. You were created to do the extraordinary not settle for the ordinary. Your worth is invaluable and believing you can do something half the battle. God says so.

5.  Surround yourself with motivated people. No one will dampen your motivated heart faster than little Miss Debbie Downer. She loves to throw past failures in your face, remind you of everything you haven’t done, and tell you of all the things you can’t do. Debbie Downer is trash and you shouldn’t listen to her. Realistically, Miss Downer has a some heart issues when it comes to cheering on her friends. You have to separate her harsh words and the reality of the situation. You can do anything, my friend.

This sweater has been on repeat for me. I may or may not have worn it 3 days in a row. Whoops. It’s such a great material and the neckline is so darling. It’s long enough to cover your rump, but short enough to wear it tucked into jeans. I styled it with simple black jeans and my favorite pumps. You can shop these items as well as similar items below. Happy Monday!

Sweater: H&M | Jeans: similar here | Pumps: Jessica Simpson | Purse: similar here |
Belt: similar here

Today Has Been The Best Day


I haven’t been too open about some things that have been going on in my life. One of the biggest things includes my mom’s battle with invasive ductal carcinoma – a form of breast cancer. The whole series of events happened so quickly and it took a while to process what was happening. I learned her diagnosis the night of my spring dance recital, which, for dance teachers, is the night that if you don’t die of exhaustion you’re a superhero. I was stressed from the recital production and then to find out my mom was in for tough road was icing on the cake, but in the worst way. I found myself standing backstage staring into space, thinking the worst. I was horrified, scared, and numb. I was ready to do everything in my power to fix her. Thankfully, the particular cancer she was diagnosed with was easily treatable and had a high survival rate. Her wonderful doctors gave her the plan of attack, which included two of the top five worst chemotherapy drugs on the market – yay. We heard horror stories. Hospital stays. Endless nausea and sickness. Sleepless nights. Extreme weight loss. Again, thankfully, while my mom definitely had her tough days, she breezed through with NO complaints or suggestions that she wasn’t feeling well. I can tell you the trick:


From the beginning of this whole process my mom put her trust completely in the Lord. I whole heartedly believe His grace is what has carried her through with ease. I’m saying all this to share my sweet mama finished her last round of chemotherapy today. She gracefully endured 12 rounds of poisin. In a few weeks she will have a minor surgery to remove the chances of this happening again and she will be home free to live her best life! I’m so thankful for my mom. She is the best person I know. She’s brilliant, kind, selfless, hilarious, hardworking, and beautiful! I’m so proud of you mama!

You can shop this outfit below!

Dress: similar here, here, and here | Chambray Shirt: similar here | Shoes: similar here and here